. Spinning .

Not being a huge fan of comic books anymore, and not being real sympathetic to teenage angst even when I was one, John Porcellino’s Perfect Example is not going over well with me.

Tired of the fuck and shit that after a while comes off as a five year old’s poo-poo, caa-caa, that is, done for sheer effect as if they’d made the words up themselves. Language is a strange thing, in that it is telling not only of place and social status, but of emotional standing as well. 

Plodding through it because there are some things here that are worthwhile and it’ll take me a bit to find them.

Toasters/Pamela Painter: Yet another view of marital relationships, this one is unique in that it shows a set of characters watching another set of characters who we never see except through the eyes of the others.  There is action and tension in the fight going on (regularly) at the neighbor’s house; the watchers, one a mother who understands the fighting and envies the honesty of it; the other, her young son who delights in watching the items flying out of the neighbor’s, yet has no clue that the same tension is going on between his mother and father only it is silent.  One of my favorites.

Diagnostic Drift/Michael Martone: Another example of incidents separated by numbered paragraphs but here too, it tells a story and the numbering system is a style that eliminates the unnecessary to focus on events separated by time that are directly related to each other.  Nicely done, and very dramatic in its topic and impact.

You Don’t Know Anything/Kathleen Wheaton: Nice story, a statement on people dealing with others who they consider not their own kind.  More of a moral message statement but nicely put.

Traveling Alone/Rob Carney: A soliloquy on lightning.If he wanted to write such heavy metaphor he should’ve written a poem.

The Death of The Short Story/J. David Stevens: Literary forms personified to mourn the passing of the short story.  Clever.

Drawer/Rick Moody: One of my favs on the theme of the breakdown of relationships, this story has a nice was of mimicking reality in the tendency of people using metaphors for the real problems they have with each other.  The protagonist’s sarcastic reference to his wife’s calling a piece of furniture an armoire rather than a chest of drawers is just an example of how he feels about her perhaps false sense of superiority.  His slow destruction of this, her favorite piece is very much his way of retaliation. A nice slice of humanity.

00:02:36:58/Bayard Godsave: A vignette of friendship, a plan, an arc of story, an episode that means something to the narrator that he shares.

The Good Life/David Ryan: Okay, presents an interesting meeting of two people and turns out to be mistaken identity.

Fruit Series/Opal Palmer Adisa:  Some intersting thoughts on life presented as imagery, nicely written, but it’s pushing it to call it a story.

Initials Etched on a Dining-Room Table/Peter Orner: Great opening: "The girl was young when she did it, and she didn’t live there."  Very inviting to ask more.  We get a nice story of infidelity and social issues of status and illigitimate birth, all making the indelible carving of initials a lasting an poignant reminder.  Nice.

Mr. Nikos Nikou/Ersi Sotiropoulos: Psychological realism, wondering, some insight into character, a little grounding, all ramble into a dream.

Three Soldiers/Bruce Holland Rogers: Set up in the form of four sections of supposedly unrelated items of military life during war, they do as a whole depict a story that develops through and between them.  Nice way of telling story without relating it as such.

Nicaragua/Kirk Nesset: No comment.

Parrot Talk/Kit Coyne Irwin: Nice opening, first person pov, placing the odd fact of parrots in the trees of Connecticut.  Very nicely done, the interweaving of a marital relationship suffering the effects of time against the episode of the parrots.  The adaptation of the parrots to their environment mimics the characters and their method of dealing.  Parrots as mimics also noted.

I Didn’t Do That/Tom Hazuka: First person pov, opening brings us right into the action and the tension with, "I look for a smile."  Two men discussing the breakup of a marriage.  The question of spousal abuse brought up as a plea for faith and testing the friendship, bringing in the past and an example that was likely testing at the time.  Short, sweet, thought-provoking.

What I Know of Your Country/John Leary:  First person pov, a very interesting perspective of the growing problem of outsourcing and telephone solicitation as we see ourselves from the other side.  Don’t see it as a story though.

The Paperboy/Sherrie Flick: Great opening line: "I seduced the paperboy yesterday." A small episode is the action of the story, but the real theme is how we see ourselves and what we do to project the image we’d like to see.

Birth/Robert Earle: Another trouble in paradise story, a little strangely put and I’m not sure it worked for me with too many similes and metaphors that failed to call up the image I think the author wanted.  But the story clearly has an arc, conflict, resolution and character change, just like the books say it should.

Guidebook/Christopher Merrill:  Another good hook: "Erosion is the greatest threat to the stability of this island."  It continues from there to offer evidence of change and the reaction and resulting action taken to forestall any further damage, mainly a slew of studies and research, etc.  The ending is dopey.

Test/G. A. Ingersoll: Another comment on relationships and life in general as sucky, but with a clever presentation as a "Test" meant to elicit the appropriate response from the reader.  A bit sarcastic, which is fine.  Not a story though–would make a nifty magazine article.

Oliver’s Evolution/John Updike: Nice little story about a neglected child for whom life dishes out nothing but dregs.  He himself causes himself harm but eventually meets a girl in worse shape than he is who looks up to him.  They marry and have children and Oliver finally feels he has a place in life.  Nice pace, conflicts aplenty though it’s a buildup of loads of mishaps and misdeeds that end with the change in situation.

The Doctor/Ann Hood: Starting out strong with "The doctor who killed my father wants to take me for coffee." this sort of dribbles down to a relationship the female first person narrator  has with her father’s doctor and even she realizes that he didn’t kill, but rather couldn’t save him. 

Crazy Glue/Etgar Keret: Delightfully quirky version of a boring marriage getting revived by change.  Opening with dialogue here is a good way of showing the relationship while introducing the characters and the ultimate savior of their marriage–a tube of Crazy Glue.

Pledge Drive/Patricia Marx: Nothing worth mentioning really.

The Handbag/Michael Augustin:  Already posted on this one, since it’s definitely my favorite so far and one that will remember a long time. 

A Patriotic Angel/Mark Budman:  The opening presents us with a scene that promises a story: "She stands in the supermarket aisle reserved for the holiday decorations.  She is not tall; maybe five inches maximum."  Right there we know this may hold something of meaning, and the story doesn’t disappoint.

Map of the Lost World/James Tate:  Related to the very first line: "Things were getting to me, things of no consequence in themselves, but taken together, they were undermining my ability to cope."  Some interesting things, more of a list of what goes wrong to screw up the day.  No resolution, no real story.

Bill/Dan Kaplan:  Missed the point of this one–if there was one.

The Kettle/Eva Marie Ginsburg: An updated fantasy of the pot calling the kettle black.  Clever story, personification, though it does come off as an Aesop’s Fable.

Quill/Tony Earley: Very nice scene of two men in a hospital, one of whom is likely dying.  Intimate episode that tells more than what it is.

Justice–ABeginning/Grace Paley: Rather introspective of a woman who takes things very seriously.  Not a grand opening, but interesting enough and there is some nice imagery though it doesn’t really go anywhere within the story.  I’m not sure the whole thing meant anything at all.

That Could Have Been You/Jim Heynen: Another play on our childhood traumas regarding dangers in our world.  An essay rather than a story here, though interesting and well written.

How to End Up/Jennifer A. Howard: Another snappy yuppie rant.

The Orange/Benjamin Rosenbaum:  How can you resist it, the opening line:  "An orange ruled the world."  Perfection.  The story follows the fact, wonderfully answering your question and mine by the second line: "It was an unexpected thing, the temporary abdication of Heavenly Providence, entrusting the whole matter to a simple orange."  It’s got a story arc as the orange takes over, things change, and  eventually its time must come to an end.  Neat idea, nicely done.

21/Jim Crace:   A story  with a message.  Nice futuristic vision of  computer technology taking over our lives Big Brother  style.  Nice opening: A youngish man, a trifle overweight, too anxious for his age, completed his circuit of the supermarket shelves and cabinets and stood in line, ashamed as usual.  Crace gives us character, place,  and the tension of questions: Why is the man anxious and ashamed?  Could see this as a longer story, fleshing out more detail of this character’s life  against this new world he inhabits.

To Reduce Your Likelihood of Murder/Ander Monson: Blegh.  This has been done a million times and in much better form.

Jumping ahead here a bit because I found this short-short absolutely delightful. Is it a story? Yes. A robber has a certain method of operation to snatch purses. Complication arises in the antagonist of 82 year-old Elisabeth Schroeder. Instead of things happening as expected, Elisabeth fails to let go of her grip on her handbag, holding on even as she is knocked to the ground.

Now this part reads a little brief, and could have been elaborated upon with some imagery without suffering for the addition. It is merely told in a few sentences how the robber need drag Elisabeth behind him for hours since neither is giving up their hold. The resolution comes when he tires and she takes over, dragging him along as she goes about her business.

Now this goes on for three years (succinctly put in the narrative) and the great turnabout is this: The situation becomes an accepted normal scenario and the suggestion is that the two characters have something going on between them in the form of attraction.

I really liked this one for its concept, it’s clever twist and its fable-like presentation, though I probably would prefer it be fleshed out a bit to develop the characters and to show what this tug of wills really involved.

Read a bunch; forgot to post on ‘em.

Blind Fish/Melanie Rae Thon: Sort of free form, not a real story but rather an essay, a parable that is full of symbolism and yet it cannot really be read as story without the need to look further for meaning.

The Voices in My Head/Jack Handey:  Excellent concept of comparing what’s typically referred to as the "voices" to our everyday thoughts.  Which are the crazy ones? Where is the line crossed? What is the ending resolution to the narrator’s problem in this statement: "But I’m not ready to throw in the towel just yet, because one thing I have learned is this: the voices may be bossy, but they’re really stupid."

The Old Truth in Costa Rica/Lon Otto:  Despite the opening, "I will tell you a true story." which makes the reader lean in closer, I’ve read too many with this same suggestion so it didn’t impress me.  It also doesn’t negate the fable quality of the story.  It’s interesting, it presents the sloths with a situation and a conflict between their own traditional nature and the danger it engenders. 

Why You Shouldn’t Have Gone in the First Place/Samantha Schoech: Same thing millions of women have written about before in their diaries and in their heads.

Mythologies/R.L.Futrell: Starts with scenario that comes to mean more as the information is given that this relationship between a man and a woman has been severed and times have changed.  Clever use of the driving trip as they see houses and neighborhoods destroyed by bulldozers of change.

Reviving Pater/John Goulet: Loved the story for its quirkiness.  Was it well written?  There is a definite arc that builds up even as they build the character  of Pater.  The  twist at the end is hinted at and yet still comes as a surprise because it happens quickly.  There is irony in the ending statement, since after all the violence the narrator claims, "Of course, this discussion period was also part of our tradition; it was by considering such issues in a sensible way that we grew closer as a family."

Bullhead/Leigh Allison Wilson: A simple story of love and loss, nothing really exciting about it.

Accident/Dave Eggers: Unusual in its 2nd person pov.   Tension starts immediately with a car accident and builds quickly, but is dissipated just as quickly as the characters are accepting of the situation.  The real conflict beneath the interaction is the loneliness and reaching out for communication by any means.

All Girl Band/Utahna Faith: Starts out great with "My all girl band is in trouble."  Even as the narrator admits she doesn’t know why she feels terror at what she has done and is about to turn herself in for.  We never know either.

I Never Looked/Donald Hall: Sort of a sad little story of an illicit affair; reminded me of Hemingway’s Hills Like White Elephants in that the man and woman appear to be on separate wave lengths.  The ending is sort of depressing in that it shows each returning to their separate worlds.

Fab 4/Jenny Hall: Nice little flashback to a better time; maybe a statement on how TV was supposed to ruin mankind and yet mankind did that without its assistance and still survived. The "Fab 4" reference is, of course, to the Beatles.

The Peterson Fire/Barry Gifford: Nice detail, but the story doesn’t really seem to ever develop.

Two good ‘uns; expecially Level by Keith Scribner which has much to teach about metaphor:

The Cats in the Prison Recreation Hall/Lydia Davis: Presents the major conflict in the opening line: "the problem was the cats…" to focus the reader then on the situation or event rather than bringing him in via setup of character or environment.  Action includes side complications (skin conditions) and the resolution of the warden shooting the cats.  End is a bit fuzzy and makes me believe that the whole story is a metaphor.

Level/Keith Scribner: This story is precisely metaphorical in its obvious use of the physical level against the relationship and balance of control (complete with conflict–buying things) within it.  Excellently done. Even the ending balances the green bubble between the two (green-symbolic of money).

How to Set a House on Fire/Stace Budzko: Not a riveting story, more like a weblog post geared towards the sarcastic attempt to be clever

Currents/Hannah Bottomy: In a series of "before that(s)" the story works backwords through a disturbing series of events that touches poignantly on the drowning death of a small boy to finish with a powerful statement of the beginning: "Before that, it was a simple summer day."  Nice.

1951/Richard Bausch: Telling the story of a young girl’s realization of the power she holds over her father in his choice of female companion, and feeling responsible for the death in childbirth of her mother, the suicide of the housekeeper, and reveling in her supposed strength.

Bullet/Kim Church: Best line: "Here’s what I learned from marriage: I am not brave. I never will be. But I am patient, and I can outlast anyone." The story rides on this theme as the woman patiently deals with conflicts that come her way, looking forward perhaps to the day when her husband ends up facing something and doesn’t come out ahead.

Consuming the View/Luigi Malerba: Sort of fairytale-like in its simple premise of a town believing that a view is being destroyed by too many foreign tourists taking it in.  A number of political maneuvers to dissuade tourism fails, and the solution of eliminating the view via planting a line of trees is a lesson in itself.  Neat story.

The Great Open Mouth Anti-Sadness/Ron Carlson: Beneath the rambling tone of the story that mimics the narrator’s drunken state, there is a nice statement perhaps on a father’s sadness at losing his daughter to marriage.

Things You Should Know/A. M. Homes:  Sort of clever variation on the idea of what’s life all about? but it seems to fall a bit short in its zoom through the narrator’s life to end in a confrontation with someone who proves he knows by providing diagrams and backup while the narrator, unsure throughout life, finally feels the confidence to realize that life experience has provided the list of things one should know.  I think.

Rose/Biguenet:  Rather nicely done, a story of the loss of a child and years later, the loss of his wife and a man realizes how his wife had secretly coped with their son’s life, and he recalls the very night the boy was killed and the image of red roses as he hurried to the scene of his son’s death.

Tiffany/Stacey Richter: Who the hell knows.  I don’t have time for this one.

The Fallguy’s Faith/Robert Coover: Another idea overwritten and overdone to death. Some of these flashes of fiction could honestly have even been shorter.

By John A. McCaffrey, third person pov, linear narrative with flashbacks recalled by the theme of words.  Opening with a description by a man of his girlfriend’s apartment while she is away picking up a pizza, we realize he is forming an opinion of her by her surroundings and finds himself comfortable in the space.  McCaffrey then introduces conflict via a notebook in which she apparently has been learning English words by writing down the definitions of something he has said to her.

McCaffrey gives us the detail of emotion without the character being present (se: How do I say it without saying it?).  Following a description of her dainty and precise script, he comes to the word "possessive" and explains it thusly: "It is almost scratched into the paper.  There is no curl at the end of the "e." The definition for "resolve" is written in all caps. Here lies the tension between the couple, that the man is just realizing now.

This particular story emphasizes the  element of character change brought about by facing conflict.  It is ironic that even as he learns about her  from her things rather than their  communication, he is facing himself and acknowledging that changes might be necessary.  McCaffrey closes in on this particular character, his particular relationship even as he provides a background of people in other apartments all around him going through their own routines.  He does resolve to change: he searches for the special word he knows and wants her to write down.  He’s such a sweetie.

So there is some satisfaction given the reader in this story, something fragile seen in relationships and yet we are cheered by his awareness and attitude.  That is, if this is more than a momentary guilt.

By Leonardo Alishan.  First Person POV, psychological realism or stream of consciousness, absolutely soaking wet with symbolism. 

It starts off immediately with changing place and space in the first sixteen words:  "I cut my lower lip shaving and I was by the gates of the Black City…"

We are then led by the narrator into a dreamlike world in which he comes face to face with his relatives, his wife, and eventually himself at different stages of his life, but all coming from a city that he calls by turn strange and "mine so intimately" that we are tipped off to follow details closely, that each statement made is likely meaningful and vital to the understanding of this tale.

While I do not immediately have an opinion on the symbols themselves, they are fairly obvious in their presence: a mosque opposite a cathedral on each end of the street, and in this statement: "if I was alive; and I was alive though still connected with an umbilical cord to the wet womb of a dead god."

Aside from the religious questioning, there is the subject of happiness, childhood innocence and mature understanding of life.  One this is clear, he’s been a prick to his wife: "every day that she spends with you is spent in sorrow for the day and in despair for tomorrow; thus, I, her yesterday, grow happier and more radiant in her memory."  This leads to one of the great statements made: "How wrong you are, on the other side, to think the past cannot be changed."  The past, only available in memory, indeed changes with influence and perception.

Didn’t quite get the meaning behind the grandmother being queen of the city after the narrator was so sure he had built every part of it and was therefore its King, although the sacrificing of her on a regular basis may reveal a gender based hierarchy that would provide insight into the relationship between him and his wife.  From an innocent and happy little boy (likely spoiled) to the overbearing ways of men of his culture perhaps is seen in the final scene of this daydream.  We are then returned to the man cutting his chin with the razor as he shaves.  And of course, wonder if he’s found some meaning in the dream that may better his life even at this late stage.

Nicely done, a story with a moral of sorts, though even as the gates of his past slam shut behind him, it seems in conflict with the importance of memory changing the past.

By Barbara Jacksha, written first person pov, hits the ground running with the immediate situation, filling in a few details as the story moves along in linear timeline.

Jacksha gives us the perfect triangle of conflict, a man, his wife, and his father-in-law forming a physical triangle in the cutting and taking down of a large tree.  Excellent concept here; the image emphasizing the underlying theme.

She also starts the narrative at a precipitous point: "Moments before the dead oak fell, we formed an equilateral triangle."  There’s the promise of action in that opening line.  The next few sentences introduce the characters, the narrator’s new wife, Sherri and her father Buck, both of whom are obviously comfortable in this setting as opposed to the ‘city boy’ narrator. He, however, is aware of the geometry and the planned fall of the tree.  Complications arise with the indication that the ice on the lake, on which he and Buck are standing, and in which direction the tree is proposed to fall, is not completely rock solid in the late spring weather.

In the ensuing action of the tree falling, there is a curious detail: Buck loses his grip on the rope–this, though the rope shouldn’t be tightening but rather needing drawing-in, as the tree falls.  Whether this is a plan on Buck’s part, or Sherri’s in how she made the cut with her chainsaw, is a question.  Then again, it could be accidental.

The narrator feels the balance has shifted as well:  "Then I realized that the equilateral image was gone: the triangle we now formed was undeniably acute."  His wife first runs to check on her father and when assured that he is all right, only then looks up toward her husband. He cannot quite read her expression, but he sees enough to convince him of where he stands within this group of three. 

Very nicely done.  Geometry metaphorically given strength in image, though it was not left up to the reader to discover for himself, and this might have been a more perfect and polished presentation of the concept.

Third person pov, linear structure, starts right off into the action with Moody on a train noticing a young woman and in his immediate desire for her and empathy for what he guesses is a sadness within her, he hypnotizes her and they go off to live happily ever after.

The author, Michael Knight, gives us a setting, a situation, and a follow-through within the first three paragraphs.  He also offers a conclusion–had no conflict arisen to move the story out further.  A "stranger" enters the picture to threaten the happiness of the couple.  What Moody has noted is a natural talent of Penelope–her piano playing–turns out to be of prize-winning value as the stranger has been after Penelope to award her this prize.  The solution of course–and we can only be happy that Moody has caught the man in time–is to hypnotize him and send him on his way, no one the wiser.

Here is the ultimate protagonist wanting something and when conflict arises, finding out just how far he’ll go to achieve and hold onto the object of his desire. It need be noted that even while it appeared that Moody wanted to make Penelope happy, having sensed her sadness (which truly was not established by her confirmation), he understood because he had felt that sadness, that loneliness.  Therefore, he in fact was really only seeking to better his own situation, compounding it by taking her former life away from her.

There’s some nice language use: "He bent and picked up the picture, stood looking at it until Penelope’s music came back to him, a melancholy sound on the fragile air."  But then, what exactly is "fragile air"?

The ending is a bit diverted into a rollout of the future, bright and happy as he sees it, as long as he maintains control over her past.  The last line, "Moody wondered if their footprints would be covered by morning" indicates to me that there will always be the threat of Penelope finding out the truth, and like the snow, he must cover their tracks.

Baker’s Helper by Cynthia Anderson: Very intriguing, arresting with it’s poignant depiction of a beautiful little girl who seemingly starves because she craves but will not eat goodies from a bakery.  Don’t quite get the ending, but it was a good read.

Before the Bath by Ismail Kadare: Excellent concept, though I’ve seen it before, of providing different repetitive endings that allow the protagonist some small bit of knowledge.

The Barbie Birthday by Alison Townsend: Good story arc, not much excitement until the end when we learn much more  about the narrator and the meaning of it all.

Sashimi Cashmere by Carolyn Forde:  Weird enough, not really a story that tells much of anything but a strange dinner.

Sleeping by Katharine Weber: Sounds rather tame, but believe that this had the most traditional arc of story and buildup of tension along with a twist and nice resolution.

The Jalapeno Contest by Ray Gonzalez: Good story arc, gross story.

Traditional Style Indian Garage by Chrystos: Psychological realism or stream of consciousness, funny, interesting, no real story arc, but fun unless you take it as a serious diatribe against America.

The Memory Priest of the Creech People by Paul Theroux: A story of a tradition, a legend really, which is the oldest form of story.

Rumors of Myself by Steve Almond: Who the hell knows.  It didn’t intrigue me enough to try figuring it out.