REALITY?: Putting Fun on Hold

Whatever fun I’ve been able to rumble up lately, that is.

Finishing up the income taxes to be ready to meet with my accountant tomorrow morning.  Some new stuff in this past year’s routine paperwork: the death of my father-in-law, Jim’s unemployed couple of months, medical expenses paid out of pocket in those uninsured months, some other little stuff going on.

With a home business, I’m a more likely candidate for an audit.  We were audited a few years back but even with old fashioned penciled-in spread sheets, we came out fine.  Actually, the agent complimented my bookkeeping methods.  I use Quicken now for the books, both for the shop and for our personal stuff but there’s still the receipts to gather and all the questions to list for my accountant.  Oh yes, and the answers too.

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NEW MEDIA: Flow of Ideas

It’s interesting to analyze the flow of creative ideas.  You have a need, you ponder a while on how to fulfill that need, you hop around in research, you come up with a better idea–often through the process of elimination–of what you’re looking for as a tool, and then you hit upon something.  Or so you think.

Just this morning I e-mailed a friend about a software program I’m seeking, and particularly what I want it to do for me and how I’d like it to work.  It’s one of those Ahah! moments, and yet something doesn’t feel right about it.  A couple hours later you find out why.  It’s nothing new; what I came up with as a solution was a workspace environment based upon my own learned comfort zone.  Work left to right, allow for up and down–in other words, a writing and working area that I’ve used all my life.

Amazing how we often come full circle.  In creating the new we depend upon the old, while still seeking to go beyond it by breaking the barriers that restrict us.  Yet there’s something to be said, I suppose, for what has taken centuries to come to that point. 

I feel I want to pick up threads and unravel them; fan them out in new directions.  Yet the thread must be there to go on. 

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WRITING & REALITY?: Breaking Out

I’ve mentioned this before; learning from watching some of the reality shows–the ones that do have some measure of reality still left.

I’ve been watching Grease – You’re the One That I Want for the past few weeks, and like American Idol, I’ve gotten tired of the often ridiculous and likely contrived initial auditions, so wait to see the final dozen or so top contenders. Most of these are damned good.  I remember watching Super Nova wherein Tommy Lee and a few others were looking for that special lead singer for a new band.  Here’s where the entertainment is well worth the watching, regardless of the battle going on.

My point here is that as a writer I’m learning much from the programs.  For example, last night’s rejected Sandy was a surprise–and yet it wasn’t.  I could see where she fell short.  Kate has a wonderfully strong and wide range voice and was the best in that area definitely.  But even with all what sounds like dopey "Sexy Sandy" or "Flirty Sandy" labels, what the judges are saying is that they’re looking for a well-rounded character.  Kate was definitely flat.  She tried hard to break out of that "Kate" persona, but just couldn’t do it.  The same lovely smile was pasted on her face regardless of the tone of the song she was singing.

Here’s where a writer can learn something.  First, he has to recognize his own personality within his characters and get rid of it.  Secondly, he has to dare to go beyond his own experience to try something new.

Kate didn’t.  Kate got the old heave-ho; the actor’s version of the rejection slip.

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REALITY?: A Life Defined

Been staying away from reality lately in posting, it’s not pretty.  And the backyard inspirations are dark.  Stream of consciousness here, I suppose: need a project to focus upon to exclude all else.  Taking classes kept me focused.  Writing a story does too.  Finding though that I don’t enjoy video games–don’t like playing at reality.  Belonged to the Society for Creative Anachronism once, as medieval Lady Susanna of Rivendell, Master Bowman and appointed by the Queen.  Fed seventy folk from three different centuries, Huns to Royalty, camped for three days in our backyard.  Wore a leather tunic laced quite open up the sides or a long velvet gown and chainbelt; felt pretty, but uncomfortable. 

So there’s the reason and the problem I face:  I am a realist.  In art, in reading, in writing, in life, I don’t venture far from what I see as a comfort zone–that which is clearly recognizable.

But there’s hope.  I recognize the little rebellions, the walking the edge, the desire to break free without fear. 

And with time passed like an hourglass, the years ahead running down, the desire to astound becomes more imperative.   I am impatient. 

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NEW MEDIA: Logic & Rerouting

Okay, so this project is likely going to be a running theme here, so if you’re not into it, just avoid the NEW MEDIA postings.

Solved one of the previous problems of the way Premiere didn’t work within the program according to the tutorial.  For some mysterious reason the project called up under "Lesson 1" wasn’t the right one, and thus files were missing and it didn’t do what it was supposed to do.

Something exciting here though; the screen brings with it the discomfort of suddenly finding oneself in a strange environment.  Left alone long enough, one tends to start looking around, opening drawers and closets

But new things are coming up to think about.  I’m not sure yet if hyperlinking ability is available in Premiere (didn’t think it was in Powerpoint at the time I used it for a project once but it was), and that means several options are open and new directions for the piece I’m working on.  I could avoid Premiere and do it in Flash where the hyperlinking ability is available, or…

…I could decide to make the piece authorly and screw the interactive idea.  The author lives!  Seriously, I can see the piece as managed by the sequencing between the stories, transitions being a big part of the moves between the four stories. It’s mighty tempting.  Mainly because it’s challenging.

But, hypertext is what I’m trying to learn, to break the code that transforms a static story into an open-ended experience for the reader, and that’s a challenge for me too.

Then again, being a control freak, wouldn’t the biggest challenge of all be to manipulate readers into believing they’re in control?

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NEW MEDIA: An Amateur takes on A Pro

Usually I can teach myself any software by just playing around in it.  I feel it’s the best way to learn (for me anyway) because often a course teaches you in a structured manner, and you’re bombarded with information that you won’t be using much and when you do go to use it, it’s been a year and you’ve forgotten anyway.  It just seems that when you learn because of a need, it sticks with you.

However, facing the opening screen of something like Flash 8 or Premiere is scary–there’s just so much there.  So I figured that downloading the first three lessons straight from the Adobe tutorial site made sense.  Or so I figured.

Two things have gone wrong already.  First this, straight from the Adobe site:

Copy the P Pro 2.0 CIB Workspace.layout file to your My Documents\Adobe\Premiere Pro\2.0\Layouts folder.

The only problem is is that I can’t find this file anywhere in the unzipped tutorial files, or anywhere else on my hard drive.  Where was I supposed to copy it from?  Seeking help from the site search box brought me only to this same spot above.

Second, once I opened the project and started following the tutorial, the first thing I’m supposed to do is:

To place a clip in the Source Monitor, double-click Video 1a in the Project panel. 

I did.  It didn’t. 

This is frustrating; I’m not normally a follow directions type of person, but when I dedicate myself to doing so, it’s annoying as hell not to have an easier time of it than had I messed around and finally stumbled across it myself.

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NEW MEDIA: Story Form

While I’m slowly learning how to move around a bit in Adobe Premiere, I’m thinking ahead to the four-story project and how it would need to be arranged to suit this format.

While I can see stills, movies and some form of audio–likely music (though I have to check on copyrights, etc.) rather than reading, I’m beginning to see that my original doubts about whether I was setting it up properly has some basis of truth. 

The premise is simple, a couple who either did or didn’t stay together after a college relationship and summer cross-country trip; the stories relate in that they are different viewpoints and different paths–the what if’s we all wonder about.  But where they intersect–the hyperlink–doesn’t completely make sense as I have it, based upon words alone.  The reader may well wander about forever and not come to the end of the story.  There’s also a flow that doesn’t always necessarily represent a logical storyline when links are clicked.

Much to think about, and I can’t seem to find the solution.

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LITERATURE: Glimmer Train #54 – Hard-hitting Story

Strange title–Night Slides Falling to Light–for this wonderfully written story by Thomas O’Malley.  Within six pages, two murders, setting that you can feel, characters that strike an immediate chord, and a story that is beautifully woven.  One of my favorites.

Making a Kite, by Miriam Novogrodsky is yet another divorced father coping with kids and life after the split–what is it with the proliferation of this theme lately?  But it is interesting and well written.  Most of these stories are showing the father’s side, and the love he still feels for his ex-wife and the spite he is capable of during recovery.  Sort of a twist on the old scorned woman story.

That’s it for this issue, I think.  There’s one I just couldn’t make myself plod through, and I admittedly didn’t read the first long story so I may go back to that.

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REALITY & WRITING: Human Nature

The longer I live, the more I believe that man is inherently evil and must be taught to overcome his own nature to live among others of his kind.  Babies will slap out at what annoys them, but must be taught how to kiss, or gently touch.  Animal litters will play fight; they do not sit down and play monoply.

What is original sin but instinct?

Much of religion in its ceremonies has been born of man’s mind; someone recognized the need for the cleansing rites of baptism, puberty, marriage, and when all else fails, the prayers for the dead.

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NEW MEDIA: Adobe Premiere Pro

Laid out a four-story group in Word just to show the story flow and connections between each.  Well, it’s not impressive, but it is a map of sorts.  I was only able to use the words that I’ve considered as what will become hyperlinks between the stories.  I was hoping to have text boxes so that I could see the flow–which really has to be based on more that just these words, more like one random thought leading to another as in natural thought patterns–but Word just didn’t really allow for it unless I took pages and pages to get it all in there.

Storyspace is still a bit too pricey for my purposes, so I’m looking for an alternate authoring tool, and there are a few that are possibilities.

After all the cryin’ and moanin’ I’ve done about learning Flash 8, it’s possible for me to perhaps more easily learn Adobe Premiere Pro instead.  The basic tutorials appear more easily comprehensible, and I’ve already imported some stuff from the poem I laid out in Windows Movie Maker.  I’m using this as a test, rather than a new story or poem because most of the work is already done, planned out and set, so that I can concentrate instead on the technical aspects of learning the program.

If this works well, the story grouping may be tried out in Premiere.  Oh yeah, as soon as I learn to use the camcorder and can get some movies as well as stills of cornfields. 

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LITERATURE: Glimmer Train #54 – Reader’s Rights

I’m getting old and losing patience with any waste of time.  I’ve overcome my innate need to finish what I start and so (with a bit of guilt) have learned that if a story is not enjoyable, read a bit more.  If it is also not teaching me something about writing and sense of story and style, then quit reading. 

So that’s what I’ve done with a couple stories in this issue.

However, in View From the Pines, author George Fahey presents a wonderful character study (Lucille, a lady who, like me, likes to take her coffee outside and ponder the back yard–and of course, she likes Willie so she’s A-okay in my book) of a woman without giving an overdose of backstory.  We see great imagery in the backyard where she thinks she sees something, and the bit of history has us speculating exactly what it might be that she may see.  I loved it.

Lex Williford’s Beck’s Girls is a coming of age theme but with a nice twist of having a rather peculiar antagonist that keeps us wondering about the character and her allure to the first person narrator/protagonist.  What keeps us from questioning it is the fact that the protagonist is a fifteen year-old boy, and his interest is a wispy yet intrigueing twelve-year old girl. We’re also given a dramatic situation, and an unanswered question that hangs in the back of our minds at story’s end. Good stuff.  

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POETRY: Evolution

It was better then; you’d laugh
and see the things I showed you
that weren’t there. 
When did opalescent dreams that only two could know
turn into feathered shadows?

Right here, I’d say, and you would nod
your sandy head
and answer, "Maybe blue, or aqua green,"
as walls turned shades and flowers grew
in the middle of the lawn.

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NEW MEDIA, REALITY, LITERATURE, WRITING: Contemplation

Pondering:

Purpose, beyond being fruitful and multiplying.  Man’s place in living.

Wherein lie my talents, skills?  Does anyone recognize them?  Do they exist beyond my mind? 

Layered space, separated only by time.

God.  Difficult to overcome learned faith, yet faith threatens belief.  If I go beyond the learned belief, what would I believe?

Shall I use the Waverly stripe I bought for drapes instead to cover the smaller couch?  What then, for the larger one, and for the windows?

Can I learn Premiere?

Which story shall I submit of three? And is it ready?  Are any?

How long will the books on the shelf take me to read?  How many more shall I add to last me to the end of life?

Shall I knit or not?

Movie, IF, animation, or just plain old text?

So that’s why I can’t blog right now–I’m just too busy contemplating stuff.

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REALITY?: Unpaid Leave of Absence

…for an undetermined, with any luck brief, period of time.

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BLOGGING: Leaving a Mark on Space

Curious, I tracked down a Google hit and smiled when I found what search term had led them to my weblog, and this has been about the third time I’ve noticed this:

Who said I will breakfast from the cupboard where uneaten dreams are kept?

Who? 

Me.

Posted in BLOGGING | 4 Comments