LITERATURE: Dorothy Parker

When I picked up (borrowed from John) "The Portable Dorothy Parker," the first story I read–the first in the book–was "The Lovely Leave."  I was dumbstruck by the simple language, the useage that wove it into gold. 

The book is divided into several sections according to early stories and poems, later ones, and then reviews and articles.  I have just reached the end of the first section, which is about 60% of the book.  And in reading the last story in this section, I am once again awed.

Most of the stories are similar in their portrayal of the upper middle class to wealthy lifestyle of the forties and fifties, or follow the theme which barely hides Parker’s disdain of the intricate games and inequities of relationships.  But this final story, "Clothe the Naked" stands apart in depth of character that Parker has created, and her real knowledge and caring of society’s low income and black communities.

Briefly, the protagonist, Big Lannie, is a hardworking black woman who has lost husbands and children and is then saddled with caring for her newborn grandson who is unfortunately born blind.  She must give up her job in doing laundry for a set of regular wealthy customers to take care of little Raymond, and is helped as much as possible by neighbors. 

They get by, but barely.  Raymond grows into a loving, trusting child, and Big Lannie must leave him alone when she must take whatever jobs she can get to support them both.  Raymond loves the street and being outside the apartment, hearing the children play and calling out to the neighbors and listening to their laughter and cheer.  But one winter, when all she has to clothe him in is a dress, she is able to talk him into staying inside by pointing out the dangers of snow and ice.

Come spring, Raymond is anxious to go outside, and Big Lannie begs one of her employers for something to clothe him in.  An old suit and shoes is condescendingly given, and she gives these items to a gleeful Raymond, who is unaware of how poorly the much-too-large suit makes him look. 

Raymond goes out alone while Big Lannie is at work, and his excitement in preparing for the excursion is barely contained.  "As he folded the sleeves back over his thin arms, his heart beat so that the cloth above it fluttered."

He heard the laughter once again, but: 

"As quickly as he could, he gained the walk and set forth, guiding himself by the fence.  He could not wait; he called out, so that he would hear gay calls in return, he laughed so that laughter would answer him.  He heard it.  He was so glad that he took his hand from the fence and turned and stretched out his arms and held up his smiling face to welcome it.  He stood there, and his smile died on his face, and his welcoming arms stiffened and shook.  It was not the laughter he had known; it was not the laughter he had lived on.  It was like great flails beating him flat, great prongs tearing his flesh from his bones.  It was coming at him, to kill him."

Dear God.  We follow him running and falling and tearing his clothes to find his way back home, where Big Lannie finds him whimpering and moaning in a corner of the room. 

Did we know, did we suspect what would happen, and is the pain worse because as readers, there was nothing we could do. 

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REALITY: Morning Drizzle

Perfect for the garden.  Perfect for me, directing me back indoors to work my way through piles of computer parts perhaps or picture frames.  And to study, to read the textbook and to plod my way through course lectures while I nail together frames.

And all the while, the rhododendrens grow and nibble at my house.

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LITERATURE: Suttree’s Demons

At long last I read the words that have been pointed out to me many months ago: 

"Am I a monster?  Are there monsters in me?"

There is a bond I feel with Suttree, not of lifestyle or way of thinking, but something that has me want to cradle him at times like this.  He has been hurt in life and has risen above it.  He has hurt others.  But Suttree has a conscience.  He is aware that by his actions he sets his course, and accepts it to ride the waves.  But every now and then something happens in his life, something that makes him wonder, something that makes him doubt himself and take more blame than he deserves.  At the moment he speaks the words, he is in the midst of a thunderstorm, challenging lightning to strike him; perhaps challenging God, or himself.

Wanda has been killed by a landslide.  She was the oldest daughter of Reese, the family Suttree’s been staying with a while in hopes of finding some wealth through musseling, then staying on because he has nothing better going back at his place on the river, then staying on, perhaps, because he has found love of sorts, a lust and caring in this girl-woman, and then she dies.  This is when he leaves the family and returns back to his home on the river, but things have changed.

Does Suttree blame himself for Wanda’s death, just for her being with him?  When Suttree helped Leonard dispose of his father’s long-dead body, Suttree went to church, and then went to the woods and stayed there for a few weeks.  I think he needed to find something that was good in life, something away from the despair and hurt that surrounded him among the lives of his friends.  I think he needed to feel clean and fresh; the things he does, the things he sees, have filled him to the bursting point, are just a bit beyond his control. 

There’s more to Suttree, and there’s less to him.  But still I want to hold him and tell him he’s all right.

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REALITY: Dirt-rich

Day four or five of being crusty with soil and even I, who revel in the smell of earth am getting tired of being dirty.

Halfway around the house in trimming.  The rhododendrens saved for last because they absolutely  must be done so I won’t be tempted to give up too soon before they are.  Then the garden in the front and around the barn.  And then, the so-called English garden on the hill.  By then, I’m sure, it will be time to head back to the vegie garden to weed again.

Dead-tired like nothing else can make you feel.  Using every muscle in your body.  Showering afterwards, and it too is refreshing and envigorating as never any other time can make you feel.

But the beans are in, and twelve more pepper plants.  And the yellow squash, bless them, are poking through the soil.

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EDUCATION: Online Exams

As I noted, I managed a 93 on the exam, but the point is that my preparation for it was more a case of trying to listen for and notate what I felt were key points that would turn up on the exam from the lectures.  Not easy when the information is given through a layer of static.  More students have recently stated their own problems that mirrored my own:

"I was having the same problem.  Lecture 6 was all static and I had to listen to each slide two or three times to understand what was being said.  I have also tried different computers with no improvement.  Hopefully it can be fixed soon.  I feel like I will miss something important being said in the lecture."
"I’m glad I’m not alone here.  I was getting pretty frustrated during the past few lectures.  It’s not all the slides though.  It kind of sounds like when someone blows air into a telephone." 
The instructor has promised to look into the audio problems.
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REALITY: Buzzed…

…on homemade peach wine.  My homemade peach wine.  ’98 — a good year.  Gus had only a glass out of the bottle.  I drank the rest.  I worked outside this morning.  Damn good thing, too.   ‘Cause I’m just about useless right now.  ’98 peach wine.  A good year.  I remember making it.  This was the wine that got my niece, Alisa and all her bridesmaids drunk at her wedding shower.  Only the raspberry was better than this year’s peach wine.  Did you know that homemade wine goes far above the 12% alcohol limit for wine?

Sister and brother-in-law, friends Gus and Biz, and Barbara from next door plus his dad for dinner tonight.  (gee it’s hard making typing this coherently.  I very seldom drink!))   Maybe I shouldn’ta got online…)  But I seldom drink and homemade wine is quite potent, you know.

Got a 93 on my Nutrition exam.  Kinda wrecks my argument on the static.  Guess I heard enough to make sense of it. 

Jim’s dad is weird.  We thought he was in the bathroom, but it turns out he left without saying anything.  He’s decidedly strange.  Just up and left.  And, I forgot to go for a ride on the Ducati with Gus.  Or the Porshe with Jim.  Am I getting old?

Oh well.  Tomorrow’s another day. 

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REALITY: Independence Day

Working outside, finished weeding all of the big garden and found four baby peach trees–real ones this time.  Repotted to move someplace else.  And then…

Because the weeds are all gone and there’s nice empty soil, went out and bought more pepper plants and beans.

Am trimming around the house finally.  Need to cut back the rhododendrens before they eat the house.

And, made a potato salad and cake since we’re slowly accumulating a ragtag group of folks to come over for a cookout.  Last minute sometimes is the best.

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EDUCATION: Online Courses

Just an update…

I took the exam yesterday between 5 p.m. and 6:30, though there was a two-hour time limit set for the 50 questions.  Most were multiple-choice, but there were six that required short essay answers.  Usually the test is graded automatically and immediately, but with the essays, they will need to be reviewed by the instructor so I don’t know when I’ll know how I did on it.

I will say this, that I was pleasantly surprised to note that the questions and possible answers were very reasonable.  Even with the possibility of two answers, I wouldn’t say they were the usual tricky kind.  One thing I should have done but didn’t was to go back and go over all the questions to ensure that I had the best answer or that I didn’t inadvertantly click the wrong one.  But I tend not to doublecheck and was especially anxious just to get the darn thing done that I’ll willingly accept blame for my own stupidity if it shows up, and no doubt it will.

Of course these online courses are all open-book, which is something I never did understand.  All you have to do is know where to look up the answers quickly, and the result of the course is that while you may never learn the material, you have learned to do whatever is necessary such as listing terms alphabetically with page numbers or make charts to find the info fast.  I imagine that there is the possibility as well of having someone there to look things up for you!  No–I wouldn’t think of asking him, and neither would Jim help me.  The fact alone that I could look up the answers feels like cheating to me.

I have already downloaded and printed out the lecture notes and study guides for the next exam, mainly because I want to get this over and done with as soon as possible.  I did take courses in philosophy and psychology online, but at least with the philosophy course there were essays to write and e-mail in to the instructor which seems more telling of a student’s understanding of the material.  There were also planned debates as students paired up and chose from a select list of topics.  I took the pro position for eating meat and creamed my opposition on all fronts.  It was great fun, doing a lot of research on the government sites for statistics to blow her out of the water.

But getting back to this Nutrition course (during the entire exam I smoked and drank coffee!), I will post my results as soon as I get them.  I’ll also post regarding the severe static problems I’ve had and have notified the instructor again about it because they continue unabated on the next lectures as well.  She has admitted that while on her home computer there is no static, there is the same noise I get when she uses the campus computers, and has once again promised to check the problem out with the tech people.

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REALITY: Call of the Wild

…and of the windborn seeds that weary come to rest upon a plot of land to name it for their own.  Seeds like pioneers with hopes of California gold or needs to settle in the fertile soils of Idaho and grow potatoes.  Greedy white man weeds that overtake the land.  Or maybe just the opposite, the red man wandering, searching for the last dusts of his native home.

I’ll work outside all day today, breathing air that’s free.  Maybe though, since garden soil should not be tracked inside the house, I’ll bring the laptop out to write should inspiration hit or to satisfy a curiousity of what’s hit others.

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EDUCATION: More…

Was just about to log in and go for the exam but checked the discussion boards and chickened out again when I spotted this message from student, TJ  Posted on Saturday, July 2, 2005 1:16pm:

"it might just be me but i feel as if this 2nd exam was very hard and advanced and the answers offered were vague not even matching the books descriptions or definitions in the book. If every quiz is going to be worded in the teachers words and not the book then why buy the book?"

Keep in mind that these are "the teachers words" that most of us are having trouble hearing because of the poor audio rendition.

For 33 students that took the first exam, the average score is 74.2%.  That’s after the allowance of an additional 6 points for the at least three confusing multiple choice questions where two answers were considered correct after argument. 

Also, my thanks to The Great Lettuce Head for some recognition of the problem.

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LITERATURE: Suttree/Character Via Dialogue

And here I thought Dorothy Parker was good; here’s McCarthy’s Suttree when they finally find their way back to camp: 

"He lay down in his blankets.  It was growing dark, long late midsummer twilight in the woods.  He wanted to go down to the river to bathe but he felt too bad.  He turned over and looked at the small plot of ground in the crook of his arm.  My life is ghastly, he told the grass."

Wow.

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LITERATURE: Suttree/Imagery & Structure

How’s this for imagery: 

"They crossed a pasture where grackles blue and metallic in the sun were turning up dried cowpats for the worms beneath and they went on past the back side of a junklot with the sun wearing hard upon them and upon the tarpaper roof of the parts shack and upon the endless fenders and lids of wrecked cars that lay curing paintlorn in the hot and weedy reeks."

Now "they" is Suttree and Reese–a family man who talked Suttree into following him downriver with promises of great wealth from mussel pearls, which didn’t quite pan out–and they are making their way back home early on a Sunday morning after a Saturday night filled with booze and whorin’. 

Can’t you just feel their achin’ heads and wayward walkin’? 

One of McCarthy’s techniques, as I see it, is to set the pace of an event and give it its import and meaning by sentence length and punctuation–or lack thereof.  The above is truly a run-on sentence (and I love McCarthy for it!) unbroken by commas and yet the mouthful is still just enough to read without becoming tiresome.  The necessary breaths of the reader are limited to the reader–McCarthy doesn’t tell us to stop before each "and" unless we need to.  And, if we don’t need to, the pace we keep is exactly the same as that of Suttree and Reese as they weave their way home.

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EDUCATION: Online Lectures

Honestly, I wish I could give you the ID and password to show you how impossible these lectures are to listen to and learn anything from because of the poor quality audio.  The text notes follow the lecture slides, but much of the audio explanation of the outline format is necessary to understand what is being presented.  For example, the text may pose a question, but the answer is only in the audio portion, and the static makes it extremely annoying–I’m talking hours of lectures here–to listen to it all.

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BLOGGING: Changes…I hope.

Somehow the personal keeps creeping in here though I’ve promised myself I wouldn’t let it.  Will build higher walls, thicker and more sound.

July is going to be another rough one.  The plan is to make it end by the 15th.  I need the last two weeks to change, to think, to work at what I need to do, unhampered by July.

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WRITING: Exercises

Been out of inspiration mode, out of writing, reading mode.  Should have forced myself to write an exercise a day.  Would have kept ideas moving, could have used the practice in learning how to create on cue, grow instead of stifle what I learned to do just a little better than I ever had before last week.

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